Why being a grain foreman at a elevator is the best job if you are a redneck

[BigusSchmuck]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alicel,_Oregon
First off, I'm surprised there is even a wikipedia page on a grain elevator I had to drive 2 hours to go do some work at! Anyway, I had to drive out to this elevator to work on the camera system I had installed back in April and when I arrived at Alicel I saw the grain foreman in his wife beater shirt out in the sun with a lawn chair. I think to myself, hmm thats odd I wonder what he is doing and upon closer examination the guy had a pellet gun and was hunting these sparrows/starlings that had created a huge network of nests on the eves of the elevators!
I thought to myself, Jesus Christ don't these guys have anything better to do? I asked the gentlemen why he was shooting sparrows and starlings and he told me flat out that the bird shit is toxic to the dolly pile (for those who don't know what a dolly pile is when a grain elevator reaches capacity and they have to literally dump the grain into a pile) and that our lovely company didn't have the resources to hire a exterminator to keep the birds out.
I suggested that he didn't piss off the angry birds as they may do their business on him and suggested taking some of my wife's cats to the elevator for pest control. He mumbled something  to the effect that the EPA or something crazy like that doesn't allow cats on the premises. So I left him to hunting his birds as I started to gather my equipment and I kid you not even 5 minutes later he screams that one of the birds shit on him directly on his face!
Red faced and pissed off, he says he'll be right back and I continue to gather my equipment to diagnose the cameras at the elevator. I would say about 20 minutes later I hear several loud BOOMS and when I went to go investigate the guy busted out with his duck shotgun! Apparently he shot a bunch of these annoying pests and was dancing and hooting and hollering like a buffoon. I just shook my head and told him rednecks and their entertainment. He laughed and I went back to work. What a way to start off harvest...

[NightWolve]

STATUS: Refusal to read block-o-text... Subject must learn to break writing into paragraphs even if break points are not technically grammatically ideal/proper. It'll still, at the very least, be easier on the reader's eyes...

QUERY: Is the term 'redneck(s)' on the way out right along with 'redskins' ??

[BigusSchmuck]

STATUS: Refusal to read block-o-text... Subject must learn to break writing into paragraphs even if break points are not technically grammatically ideal/proper. It'll still, at the very least, be easier on the reader's eyes...

QUERY: Is the term 'redneck(s)' on the way out right along with 'redskins' ??

Dunno, but drunken ranting sure is fun...

[Tatsujin]

houly schiet dat story bro!!!

[BlueBMW]

Rednecks are one of the contributing factors for me leaving the south...

[Bernie]

Rednecks are one of the contributing factors for me leaving the south...

[BlueBMW]

Bernie, you are not the redneck I'm speaking of hehe.  Yeah you drop snapping turtles into your wife's bathtub (which is absolutely hilarious)  but there seems to be a different breed of redneck 'round these parts.  <3

I suppose I should clarify... there is a difference in being country and redneck.

[BlueBMW]

Rednecks are one of the contributing factors for me leaving the south...

Now you done gone and made me feel bad

Still luv ya bern


And one more clarification...  the MAIN reasons I'm leaving the south (or east TN rather) are... I love Colorado... I miss the awesome mountains... I loathe humidity... moar career opportunities out there.  I'll definitely miss some of my friends.  I dont know if people ride "four wheelers" out in CO but I guess we will see

[esteban]

BigusShmuck! That anecdote was intriguing as well as entertaining. Seriously, I love hearing about experiences like that (since I never would have experienced first-hand).

Damn. 

[jtucci31]

Lol that story was great! Thanks for that, I'm on a Long car ride now so that was nice

It reminds me of when I started my first day at this restaurant in my small Midwestern town. First day I get there, I go back to the kitchen and the cooks are shooting at birds with a pellet gun from the kitchen. They actually get one and make the other bus boy who was training me go and "bag" the poor thing. Needless to say I didn't work there for very long.

[BigusSchmuck]

Rednecks are one of the contributing factors for me leaving the south...

Now you done gone and made me feel bad

Still luv ya bern


And one more clarification...  the MAIN reasons I'm leaving the south (or east TN rather) are... I love Colorado... I miss the awesome mountains... I loathe humidity... moar career opportunities out there.  I'll definitely miss some of my friends.  I dont know if people ride "four wheelers" out in CO but I guess we will see

Are you sure it isn't because weed is legal there? Wait until my cat comes in for the night and I'll video tape him getting excited for when I open up Side Arms.

[blueraven]

I LOL'd at this story. Revenge of the angry corvids!

I heard the term "dreadneck" yesterday. Close as I can figure, a hippie with guns who drinks instead of smoking weed or a redneck with dreadlocks who makes biodiesel and grows food. Or both.

Dude was from deep South Carolina, and completely trashed when he told me this.

[Bernie]

Yeah, I can still hear Jimilee hollering to get that monster out her house!

[BigusSchmuck]

BTW, if anyone is curious on what I had to do to setup this camera system (and more craziness) I have a thread here for you to read for your enjoyment. http://community.ubnt.com/t5/UniFi-Video/Rail-Loader-camera-project/td-p/773400 Read the last page for pictures. :-)

[HailingTheThings]

he screams that one of the birds shit on him directly on his face!

That's hilarious.